Authorities are raising awareness of a highly addictive substance about to hit the streets: Girl Scout cookies.
The Forsyth County Sheriff’s Office wants residents to know that the substance goes by a variety of familiar street names including “Thin Mints,” “Samoas” and “Tagalongs.”
Officials say the substance has new forms with lemon flavoring. Not much is known about the new “Lemonades” other than it is just as addictive as the other forms, but “Lemon-ups” are known to bear “I am strong,” “I am bold” and “I am a leader.”
These items are distributed by strong, smart, fearless young women who will lure you in with their story and get the individual hooked, an anonymous source said.
“Many people think they will just get one box, but one turns into two and two turns into five and the next thing you know you are hiding ‘Thin Mints’ in the freezer,” the source said.
The group behind this substance has an online presence and even provides an easy way to search for the nearest cookie dealer. Citizens are cautioned to stay alert as group members have been known to transact business in front of local businesses like Wal-Mart and Kroger.
Local law enforcement is concerned for the well-being of residents.
“We want to make sure everyone is safe,” Cumming Police Chief David Marsh said. “It’s not a problem for us to make sure they are disposed of properly for well-being and safety of our community.”
The City of Cumming police will accept boxes “no questions asked” 24/7.
Forsyth County Sheriff Ron Freeman issued the following statement to the Forsyth Herald:
“In the interest of public health and safety, the Forsyth County Sheriff’s Office is considering implementing a task force that will route out and seize all Girl Scout Tagalongs, Samoas, and Shortbread Trefoils out of our immense concern for citizens welfare and our genuine hunger pains.”
Freeman went on record saying that he has determined that “Thin Mints (ugh) and other varieties are safe for our public’s ingestion. We anticipate a future announcement of likely seizures of 2 percent gallons of milk in the following days depending upon our success in our cookie confiscations.”
Editors note: If you can’t make it to your local law enforcement agency, Appen Media Group will gladly serve as a satellite disposal location. Thin Mints and Tagalongs preferred.